Does it happen that you get high from a smart interlocutor? Perhaps you are a sapiosexual. Do not be afraid, this is not a diagnosis at all, but one of the most common types of sexuality, that is, what is inherent in you by nature. Sexologists and sociologists explain that sapiosexuality is expressed in attraction to someone’s intellect. Such people value this quality more than appearance, sense of humor, and even physical intimacy. How do you know if you are a sapiosexual? To do this, let’s use theory.

What is sapiosexuality


What is sapiosexuality?

A more accurate explanation of this term is described by the Urban Dictionary online English slang dictionary: sapiosexual (or sapiophile) is a person who values ​​intellectual abilities most of all and finds it more attractive than any physical indicators. This trait is expressed in the fact that sapiophile get great pleasure from the highly intellectual conversation, which is not even comparable to sex.

The concept appeared in the middle of the last century, but it has become widely used in modern times. Its popularity came with the advent of the term in questionnaires on Tinder and OKCupid, where users began to quickly join the community of “smart lovers”. However, can each of them be considered sapiosexual? Indeed, many, along with a bright mind, are excited by kisses, attractiveness, touches, and other things familiar to us. For sapiophile, it doesn’t matter. Only IQ partner. So draw your own conclusions.

Who are sapiosexuals in practice

We have already determined that these people are turned on by intellect. Beauty, a seductive body, and good manners are secondary for them when someone with sharp, non-trivial mental abilities appears nearby. A relevant example is Gatsby Wells, the character of Timothée Chalamet in Woody Allen’s A Rainy Day in New York. He is intellectual, intelligent, well educated, plays and wins poker all the time, reads a lot, plays the piano, sings well, and understands the arts. With such a guy there is something to talk about, isn’t it?

However, fans of such “wise guys” often face obvious problems. They experience difficulties in communication because they rarely manage to find interesting, worthy interlocutors. Therefore, in the company they can be silent, bored and, in the end, leave before everyone else, because they have nothing to talk about with others. Also, sapiosexuals can appear arrogant, narcissistic, and non-empathetic from the outside. But this is nothing more than a first impression, so do not judge them harshly, because that is their nature. In addition, there are advantages: sapiosexuals form very strong relationships, which are supported by understanding at the highest level. Having found each other, partners with the same level of intelligence, as a rule, have a complete mutual understanding and a happy marriage.

Signs You Are a Sapiosexual

We invite you to test yourself for sapiosexuality. We will give a few theses, and you will read them and decide whether you agree/agree with them or not:

Signs You Are a Sapiosexual

1. You are Attracted to Intelligence

You sincerely admire the radiance of the pure mind of man. If you do not immediately find it in him, then you lose all interest. After all, appearance, wealth, and success do not matter when you want to see only intellectual abilities.

2. You do not immediately trust new acquaintances

It takes time to get attached to someone and starts to trust. You first study a person: you observe how he behaves in different situations, what habits he has, and how he communicates with others, and only then, when you see the prospect, do you begin to build relationships.

3. You Love Intellectual Conversations

Inspired and reasoned discussions give you great pleasure. In addition, it helps to find the most interesting interlocutor in the company.

4. Empty talk is annoying

From leisurely secular conversations about nothing, your cheekbones are reduced and you want to run away as soon as possible. As an interested and developed person, you often lack productive, deep dialogues.

5. You Look for Personality over Looks

Communication through rudeness and disrespect is not for you, because you are impressed by those who approach solving problems calmly and wisely.

6. You are a great listener

Listening carefully to the interlocutor, it is easier for you to understand him and see in him the advantages and disadvantages. This can become the basis for further relationships with this or that person.

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7. You Value Emotional Connection

Emotionally intelligent people you find very sexy. You like those who, according to their thoughts and feelings, approach everything rationally.

sapiophile vs sapiosexual

If most of the statements appeal to you, then most likely you are a sapiosexual – a person in love with the mind. Write in the comments if this fact interferes with your life or vice versa, do you consider this an advantage? We are interested in your opinion.


1. Can someone be both sapiosexual and attracted to physical appearance?

Yes, it is possible for someone to be both sapiosexual and attracted to physical appearance. However, sapiosexuals prioritize intellect over physical appearance.

2. Is sapiosexuality a new orientation?

Sapiosexuality is a relatively new term that has gained popularity in recent years, but the attraction to intelligence has likely existed for a long time.

3. Can you be sapiosexual and not attracted to emotional intelligence?

While sapiosexuals primarily prioritize intellectual attraction, they still require an emotional connection with their partner. Emotional intelligence is often seen as an attractive quality for sapiosexuals.

4. Is sapiosexuality considered a sexual orientation?

Sapiosexuality is not considered a sexual orientation in the same way that heterosexuality, homosexuality, and bisexuality are. It is a preference for intellectual attraction rather than physical attraction.

5. How common is sapiosexuality?

It is difficult to determine how common sapiosexuality is since it is a relatively new term. However, many people report being attracted to intelligence and intellect in potential partners.